This past weekend I was home in Boston for Father's Day. On Friday night I went with my dad to Fenway to see the Sox take on the Brewers in Inter-league play. We ended up having two extra tickets so I invited my cousin Joe, a Sophomore at BU and a friend of his to the game with us. The seats were basically right on the field and I knew that they'd have a great time.
The game was fantastic. Even if you're not a huge Red Sox fan, or even a baseball fan you have to love Fenway Park; the history, the Green Monstah, the seats that barely fit my ass in them because they were built before donuts were invented. A game at Fenway is always a memorable one.
Sitting behind us were four guys; two older, two younger. They were nice enough. Talked a little too much for my taste but at least they were talking about sports and they knew what they were talking about.
At one point the guy sitting directly behind my dad started up a conversation with us. We learned that he was from the Cape, was a developer and really REALLY liked to talk about himself. Total blowhard. I lost interest with him 5 seconds into the conversation.
Just as I was turning around to bring my attention back to the game and Jason Varitek's thighs the blowhard goes, "These your boys?" gesturing to my 20 year old cousin Joe and his roomate.
I turned around slowly.
"Are those your sons?"
I looked at him with eyes that could've melted gold. "How the fuck old do you think I am?"
"I don't know. They look about 16."
"And you think I look old enough to have 16 year old boys?"
"I don't know."
"Then you probably shouldn't say anything. I'M ONLY 30!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I mean honestly, if I'm going to have a 16 year old when I'm 30 I would've at least made good of it by going on Teen Mom.