Oh boy! Oh boy! This ANTM cycle is so juicy. The girls range from totally nerdy to bitchy to strippers to "I'm toooootally stoked!" rock climbing chicks. The drama is palpable and Tyra's weave is symmetrical. A zesty recipe for a delicious season.
First of all I have to say that I was P.I.S.E.D (yeah I spelled that wrong. It's from a movie. Which one?) that there was no makeover episode this week. WTF?! The second ep is usually when the girls go from black to blond and short to long and bangs on the left side to bangs on the right side. Then I got to panicking; what if they weren't doing makeovers this season????? I think I can speak for everyone when I say that the makeover episode is what you wait for when you watch ANTM. Everything else is just child's play and fun to laugh at.
But anyhew. We start off last night's episode with a bang, or rather a fight. Surprise, surprise! Brandy Bianca is in the middle of the kerfuffle. She and Saleisha are fighting it out. Apparently Saleisha has experience modeling. She's "done" runway, print and photography. Um. So she's like pretty and all but I haven't seen her in anything. Unless she's the girl on the cover of the J.C. Penny circulars. In which case they go right to my trash.
The girl's first challenge is to do their "walk" in a straight jacket. In a mental hospital (gotta love Tyra and her clever clever locations!) What is up with Bianca saying that it's important to have a signature walk? Did anyone else think her walk was anything special? I've watched Giselle walk a runway and that girl does something all funky like with her legs and THAT looks signature. Bianca just looked like she was walking down the street to get her tracks tightened. Please. Slap on a pair of heels and if a girl can walk in them she can come off as sexy. It helps when you're liked and don't have purple hair.
It was good to see Heather not channeling Quasimodo during this challenge or during the runway show they all had to perform. And did anyone notice that the Emcee guy pronounced the designer's name like Cole-een. Then she came out and was like "Um...Hi I'm Colleen (just regular old Colleen, not COLE-een....and this guy was the guest judge? Please.) The girl who walked the runway show the best won a trip to Paris to help the designer debut her line and pretty little Saleisha won.
And Bianca was still drinking that Haterade. "I still don't think Saleisha's walk was betta than mine." She's the most annoying human. And who still gets tongue rings?! Honestly. (No offense to those people I know who have them or have had them. I understand that they have certain sexual benefit. I've never been privy to that. Aaaaand I'm done talking about this.)
The photo shoot the girls had to do was of them rock climbing while wearing couture gowns. I mean obviously right? And I love how when the judges critique the girls someone will say, "Oh how interesting. That could absolutely be in French Vogue."
Honestlyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!! No one is going to be in French Vooooogue-aaaah!!!
Anyway. I have to say that Heather kicked some serious top model ass. I still don't think that she's going to make it but she got her name called second by Tyra. Pretty, pretty impressive. The girl from Ocala, FL with the big ears got sent home. No loss there. She was about as interesting as my letter opener. And she looked like a mouse. I do love though, how at the end she was like, "I just wish my boyfriend was here so he could hug me and tell me it's OK."
Well sweetie. You'll have plenty of time to hug your boyfriend because you're going home.
See ya next week!